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CAPSULE COMMENTS: For comics on-sale Feb. 4, 2015



Lost job, crashed car, and family health issues have put me a bit behind the eight-ball, at least so far as keeping up with Shanghalla goes. So, I'm taking today off from the world and spending it on comic books, catching up with February reviews, starting first with items released Feb. 4 — or at least those things released that week that made it into my pull file. It was a short week, however, with just six new comics for me. Interestingly, four of the books — Jungle Jim, Ms Marvel, Stray Bullets and Superman — were solicited in the Diamond Previews catalog for release in January. Anyway, here's the run-down:


KING: JUNGLE JIM #1
Dynamite Entertainment, $3.99
[MILDLY RECOMMENDED]

So far, with Prince Valiant yet to be released, this is the best of the King Syndicate books, which is somewhat ironic in that this was the title I also was anticipating the least. This one reads better than the rest, I think, in part because Jungle Jim is less well-known than Flash Gordon, Prince Valiant, The Phantom, and even Mandrake the Magician. As such, writer Paul Tobin was allowed to take great liberties with the character. Here, he is a jungle god on Arboria, a planet within the realm of Flash foe Ming the Merciless. He is apparently able to both control animals and assume their shape, which is, I'd say, a fair leap from his original incarnation.

This book also does a better job that some of the the others in this new wave of King licensed books in making it clear that all of the characters live in a shared universe, where Ming's attempted invasion of Earth has just occurred, knocking Earth technology back to the start of the 20th century. That's the era, perhaps intentionally, when most of these characters first appeared.

In this issue, a stereotypically spunky Arborian girl, unable to locate Flash Gordon, wants to enlist Jungle Jim in helping to free her brother from Ming's prison. Prince Barin gives her a couple of beast men as her retinue and off they tromp into the forest to find a man who may or may not exist. It's not really clear to me if this version of Jim is still an Earth man. I presume not as he'd hardly have had time since Ming's invasion to travel to Arboria and become a mythological figure to its people.

From there it's a fairly standard search plot, with the company picking up a female village scout along the way, although there is a nice bit of bonding between our spunky lead and her hippo-man companion. We end the issue with the group finding Jim in the guise of a monkey that's been following them. Given that this series is to last five issues, it might've been more interesting if Jim had played the McGuffin a bit longer, or, perhaps even more interestingly, if the group eventually discovered he really is just a myth. But, it is what it is and I have to wonder if this series is fated to jump the shark once Jim emerges from the Jungle for the eventual prison break sequence?

The art by Sandy Jarrell, who also handles the colors, is just a step above serviceable. It's not bad, just bland, and I would have preferred a good inker to really embellish the drawings, most of which are the merest contours, with texture and shadow and definable light sources. Of course, part of the problem is that with a series like this, one really wants someone of the level of the Franks, Cho and Frazetta, or a Mark Schultz.

(Read Time: 10:45)
STORY GRADE: B 
ISSUE SCORE: 66.50
[Cover: 8:0 | Plot: 7.50 | Script: 7.75 | Layout: 6.75 | Artwork: 6.0 | Editing: 5.50 | Colors and Production Values: 7.25 | Dollar Value: 5.0 | Collectibility: 5.75 | The Gosh-Wow Factor: 6.0]




Ms MARVEL #11
Marvel Comics, $2.99
[MARVELOUSLY RECOMMENDED]

There's really not much to say about this issue, except that it's a good example of why I love this title. Basically, Ms Marvel is the hero I want in my comics — someone who is a little bit geeky, like me, but who has a strong moral compass and is always trying to do good. In many ways writer G. Willow Wilson is depicting, different gender and power sets aside, the Spider-Man of my youth. The big exception, of course, is that while this issue brings the concluding chapter of Ms Marvel's first story arc with the defeat of The Inventor, and The Inventor's inventor, after 11 chapters, the typical Spider-Man story of the '70s wouldn't have lasted more than an issue or three.

The art by Adrian Alphona continues to charm. The characters are a little too cartoonish in places, it's true, and the layouts are not always as clear as they could be in battle sequences, but he's given the character and her supporting players a definitive look that's bound to carry over if and when Ms Marvel makes the transition to other media. Ms Marvel is easily in my Top 5 among comic books currently being published.

(Read Time: 9:10, plus 3:40 for recap page/lettercol)
STORY GRADE: A–
ISSUE SCORE: 71.75
[Cover: 6.25 | Plot: 8.0 | Script: 9.0 | Layout: 6.75 | Artwork: 8.25 | Editing: 5.50 | Colors and Production Values: 7.75 | Dollar Value: 6.50 | Collectibility: 7.25 | The Gosh-Wow Factor: 7.00]



NAMELESS #1
Image Comics, $2.99
[RECOMMENDED (UNFORTUNATELY) ONLY FOR ADULTS]

In an increasingly common occurrence, my retailer got shorted on this when it first came out. He had to place a re-order, which finally arrived March 4. However, what finally came in was a second print.  The cover to my copy has an orange tint, as opposed to the green, seen at left. Clearly, my tiny shop in central Maine got its order allocated to a larger customer when advance re-orders came in higher than expected. That's my assumption anyway. Meanwhile, my assumption about the issue itself, as with most things written by Grant Morrison, is that he was strung out on something strong when he wrote it.

The first half of the book is typical Morrison weirdness. There's a nameless man searching Indiana Jones style for a forgotten relic. He's pursued — again Indiana Jones style — by a fish-faced infantry. And he'd captured by a priestess possessed by a parasitic larva. All stuff that would ordinarily peg the gosh-wow meter on my inner 12-year old. However, Morrison's script is so sprinkled with drops from his stream of consciousness as to be, for me at least, off-putting. I have trouble sinking into a story when I have to stop every third panel and wonder, "Now what the HELL does that mean?!" Some fans enjoy that kind of writing. Me, not so much. That's partly because, with Morrison, it always feels so practiced, like he's trying to hit me over the head with the fact that he knows more than he's telling at the moment. But also because, more often than not, it also feels like he's just making shit up as he goes along and, like the last episode of Lost, some plot threads will never be completed.

Speaking of "shit," it seemed odd to me that the word was spelled "shite" in the first half of the book, then "shit" in the back half. Knowing Morrison, I wondered at first if that was on purpose and, once I noticed the change, I went back to verify if it had been spelled differently in captions and word balloons. Maybe, I thought, because Morrison's stories always require more deciphering that should be necessary, that's a clue to something. But, no. it was used the same way in both captions and word balloons. It was just the British spelling in the first half of the book, then the American way at the end, as if Morrison — I see no editor listed on the book — decided, what the hell, might as well spell it the American way for the American audience, and never went back and edited the first few pages.

Of course, there was no good reason for the word "shit," to appear at all in this book, regardless of spelling. Nor "fuck." And certainly not "cunt," even once, let alone three times. This could have been an awesome all-ages book but for the language. It would have been just as easy to get across the uncouth nature of Mr. Nameless with a few less vulgar euphemisms, dashes in place of some letters, or even symbols to indicate swearing. And doing so, in my ever so humble, would have done nothing to insult the integrity of Morrison's writing.

Chris Burnham's art is very nice, and rather reminiscent of Frank Quitely here. Although he seems to lose interest in the latter half of the book. Just as Morrison's work, both plot and script, grow more conventional toward the end of the issue — turning into a story about an imminent impact from an asteroid that just happens to have a three-mile-long glyph exactly like the one on the temple Nameless raided —Burnham's layouts become less bold, his drawings more static. But maybe that's some sort of meta-textual commentary. With Morrison, you just never know.

(Read Time: 10:50)
STORY GRADE: B
ISSUE SCORE: 72.75
[Cover: 8:50 | Plot: 8.0 | Script: 6.75 | Layout: 8.0 | Artwork: 9.25 | Editing: 3.25 | Colors and Production Values: 8.50 | Dollar Value: 6.25 | Collectibility: 7.25 | The Gosh-Wow Factor: 7.00]



STAR WARS #2
Marvel Comics, $3.99
[ARTISTICALLY RECOMMENDED]

The best thing that can be said about this new Star Wars series is that writer Jason Aaron successfully captures the "sound" of the various characters, while artist John Cassaday absolutely nails their likenesses. Darth and the droids are pretty easy to depict, of course, but it's impressive how Cassaday makes Han, Luke and Leia look exactly like Ford, Hamill and Fisher, and not just occasionally in a panel that could have been taken from a movie still, but in each and every shot, from every possible angle. So, bravo there!

The drawback is that, at seven minutes, this book is a quick read for $4 and, as such, I'll probably drop the title before long. Frankly, there's not much plot here. Basically, the whole issue is our heroes trying to escape from the failed raid on Cymoon 1, the Empire weapons factory they landed on last issue.

There are neat bits, of course. This series takes place immediately after the movie I still refuse to call Episode IV: A New Hope, and Arron shows us, canonical or not, our heroes' introduction to AT-AT walkers and the 74-Z speeder bike, making it clear the tech was known to the rebels before The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. There's also a cool bit in this issue where Vader "borrows" a storm trooper's helmet after getting his own knocked off by Han. Still, the action passes quickly in only a few moment's of story time. This would be an amazing few minutes in a Star Wars movie, but therein lies the problem. What Aaron has done here is produce a few really great pages of a movie script. But comics are not movies. Although both are visual storytelling mediums, they each have their own requirements as an entertainment product. Aaron is not to be blamed. For decades comics book creators have gone beyond Eisneresque adaptations of cinema techniques to full-on imitation of film and television methods. That's led to a decompression of the storytelling such that it now takes six months of more to tell s single story in comics. It must be remembered, however, that while a visual medium, comics are, at their heart, a participatory reading experience, not a viewing event. When a comic book does not have a satisfying beginning, middle and end the reader can enjoy in a single sitting, that comic is something of a failure, no matter how expertly it apes how stories are written and directed for the movies.

So, that's my soapbox. What we get here is a great script, and great art, that will undoubtedly be great when collected into a trade paperback. But based solely on how much story we get in this issue, it is not a great comic book.

On a side note, the bit with C-3PO trying to sound tough as he walked down the Millennium Falcon's gangplank, only to drop his gun, was a fun bit that had a very Firefly vibe to it. To my mind, it sort of gave a feel for what the coming round of Star Wars sequels might have been like if directed by The Mighty Joss. It would be cool to see Arron conscripted to write a Serenity series for Dark Horse Comics. Still, keeping with Star Wars for a moment, it would be nice for once to see 3PO do something other than get broken into bits and carted off by scavengers and soldiers. I hope Aaron will allow him to be a hero at some point before I decide this series is not worth $4 a pop and bail.

FWIW, I couldn't find a cover of this issue anywhere online that would format correctly, so that's why there is no image for this section.

(Read Time: 7:00, plus 0:25 for recap page)
STORY GRADE: B–
ISSUE SCORE: 73.25
[Cover: 7:0 | Plot: 6.25 | Script: 8.75 | Layout: 8.25 | Artwork: 9.50 | Editing: 5.25 | Colors and Production Values: 8.50 | Dollar Value: 4.0 | Collectibility: 8.0 | The Gosh-Wow Factor: 7.25]



STRAY BULLETS: SUNSHINE AND ROSES #1
Image Comics. $3.50
[BRUTALLY RECOMMENDED]

Since its return from hiatus, David Lapham's Stray Bullets has run hot and cold for me. Some issues have seemed insightful, if grotesquely blithe, divinations into the human condition. Others, like this issue, seem like so much snuff porn. Truly, Lapham is the Quentin Tarantino of comics.

Sadly, this issue has a sense of things happening because that's what the plot requires, and people getting blown away because that's what the reader expects. It's kill and re-kill to the point where I've starting to forget who's who. In some ways, this book has started to become a parody of itself. There is an interesting and tense bit in which Skottie and Kretchmeyer engage in a standoff, each with a gun to Amy's head, but even that, for some reason, feels to me more imitative of Pulp Fiction, than inspired by it.

Worse, the attempt to stay on a regular schedule of 28 pages per month is making the work suffer. Stray Bullets has always had the look of an art student's sketchbook to it, and that's been part of its unique charm. But several panels, and even a couple of entire pages, in this issue look particularly rushed, as if said art student was late for class, or stoned, or, most likely, both. Anyway, there are still a lot of fans of this book, but issues like this, in which the violence seems to exist only for the sake of violence, makes me wonder if SB's time has passed, making it part of a grim 'n' gritty zeitgeist better left to the 1990s.

(Read Time: 21:50)
STORY GRADE: C+
ISSUE SCORE: 68.25
[Cover: 7:25 | Plot: 8.0 | Script: 7.25 | Layout: 8.50 | Artwork: 6.25 | Editing: 6.75 | Colors and Production Values: 5.0 | Dollar Value: 7.0 | Collectibility: 6.50 | The Gosh-Wow Factor: 5.75]



SUPERMAN #38
DC Comics, $4.99
[BARELY RECOMMENDED]

So, yeah . . . whatever. The Johns/Romita Jr. collaboration comes to a whimpering conclusion that's far more interesting in terms of what it promises for future stories than how it wrapped up this one.

This arc is the perfect embodiment of what I complained about in the Star Wars commentary above. The story begun by Johns and Romita in Issue #32 has taken seven issues (released over more than eight months) to tell. And yet, this tale of Superman's forth-dimensional reverse doppelganger hasn't really contained more than three or four issues worth of actual plot. Hell, back in the Mort Weisinger era, this story would have been told just as, if not more memorably in a single 12-page back-up story.

I also have to say I've been a little disappointed with John Romita Jr.'s work. He's a good artist, with very strong storytelling skills in the layout department, but his style just is not well suited to Superman, in my opinion. I felt when reading this issue how I imagine comics fans must have felt in the 1970s when Jack Kirby came over to DC. As I read each issue in this arc, I kept finding myself hoping that, with the next issue, someone would bring in Jose Luis Garcia Lopez to paste new heads on Superman and the other main characters.

Superman's new power, unveiled here, is interesting, and a logical extrapolation of how Superman's powers have been explained post-Byrne. Cool ideas, if not concise plots, have always been Johns' strong suit. That said, I don't expect Human Bomb-Superman to last any longer than Electric Blue-Superman, which (fool me twice) got a lot more coverage in the mainstream press. I am, however, gratified to see Johns put a lot of things back where they belong with this issue. Although I came of age during an era when Clark Kent was a TV news anchor, he really belongs at the Daily Planet, and the whole Jimmy the Billionaire thing was an amazing transformation that played out for far too long.

Finally, while it makes perfect sense in the New 52 universe — in which Clark and Jimmy are far closer to being peers than they ever were in the Silver or even Bronze Ages — for Superman to reveal his secret identity, I have to wonder how that will play out. Well-meaning Jimmy is bound to spill the beans at some point, and that can't go well, which may be why the last panel of this issue, even though it's an unnecessary double-page horizontal spread, is my favorite.

(Read Time: 9:00, plus 1:15 for promo pages)
STORY GRADE: B
ISSUE SCORE: 64.50
[Cover: 4.25 | Plot: 6.75 | Script: 7.25 | Layout: 8.25 | Artwork: 6.75 | Editing: 4.75 | Colors and Production Values: 6.50 | Dollar Value: 4.0 | Collectibility: 8.75 | The Gosh-Wow Factor: 7.25]





STAT ATTACK!
TOTAL RETAIL COST: $22.45
MY COST (retail - 20% LCS discount + 5.5% ME sales tax): $18.53

COVER PRICE
High: $4.99 (Superman #38)
Average: $3.74
Median: $3.75
Low: $2.99 (Ms Marvel #11, Nameless #1)

PRODUCT PAGE COUNT
High: 40 (Superman #38)
Average: 30.67
Median: 28 
Low: 28 (Ms Marvel #11, Nameless #1, Star Wars #2, Stray Bulletts: Sunshine and Roses #1)

STORY PAGE COUNT
High: 30 (Superman #38)
Average: 24
Median: 23
Low: 20 (Ms Marvel #11, Star Wars #2)

STORY COST (price/story page count)
Best: 19.95¢/page (Star Wars #2)
Average: 15.77¢/page
Median: 15.79¢/page
Worst: 12.46¢/page (Nameless #1)

STORY READ TIME
High: 21:50 (Stray Bullets: Sunshine and Roses #1)
Average: 11:10
Median: 10:55
Low: 7:00 (Star Wars #2)

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE (price/story read time)
Best: 57¢/minute (Star Wars #2)
Average: 37.64¢/minute
Median: 34.87¢/minute
Worst: 16.03¢/minute (Stray Bullets: Sunshine and Roses #1)

PANEL AVERAGE (panels/story pages)
High: 7.29/page (Stray Bullets: Sunshine and Roses #1)
Average: 4.94/page
Median: 4.62/page
Low: 3.53/page (Superman #38)

WORD AVERAGE (words/story pages)
High: 
Average:
Median:
Low:

ADVERTISING PERCENTAGE (total pgs inc. covers/(ad pgs - house ad pgs))
High: 18.75% (Star Wars #2)
Average: 9.31%
Median: 10.60%
Low: 0% (Nameless #1, Stray Bullets: Sunshine and Roses #1)


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PANELOLOGY: Justice League United #8



Aaaand, hello! For those of you who have not read the "About Site" page, this is a panelology review, in which I take an in-depth look at a particular comic book, panel-by-panel. I generally reserve this sort of thing for comics featuring the Legion of Super-Heroes, whose fans are nearly as OCD as me. Also, they're a super time-suck to write. So, today, we are looking at JUSTICE LEAGUE UNITED #8, the antipenultimate chapter in writer Jeff Lemire's five part "Infinitus Saga."

I'll be repeating here a lot of what I said in my latest "Capsule Comments" roundup of weekly comic book purchases, but you can read that review here, if you are so inclined. Whether you read the capsule review first or not, be warned that panelogicals are long-form reviews. You may want to go grab a snack, you're gonna be here for a while.

But first off, before launching into the snark, let me present my theory for exactly why this "may be the worst comic book ever published," as I teased in my twitter links to this page. The sharp-eyed reader will note that this issue claims to be "Part 4 of 6" in the "Infinitus Saga." Previous issues, however, have listed the story as a five-part event. 

My guess is that writer Jeff Lemire plotted out the story before the directive came down from The Powers That Be at DC to wrap up all current plot lines before the "Convergence" cover-our-asses-while-we-disembark-so-sunny-Cali linewide mega event scheduled to start in April. Rather than write one stand-alone issue for JLU #10, because what comic book writer today is capable of doing that, Lemire simply padded out the current saga with one plotless filler issue. 

Aside from no plot to speak of, my theory also answers why there are so few words and panels in this comic, such that I was able to read the entire issue in five minutes, 15 seconds. To wit: It was a last-minute rush job.

So, without further preamble, let's get to work picking it apart.


COVER:
This issue shipped with three covers, which seems somewhat conservative by modern industry standards. The best is the Flash 75th Anniversary variant, by Karl Kerschl and Dave McCaig, which apes Carmine Infantino's cover to MYSTERY IN SPACE #60, and not just because it relies on Infantino's superior design sense. It also apes the Silver/Bronze age staple of mixing copy with the cover image. That compliments the cover drawing, in my opinion, and helps to lure in the casual reader, perusing comics on the stands. While one might simply glance at the other two covers for this issue and move on with a, "Hawkman, meh," the clue that this story takes place an amazing 25 trillion miles from Earth against an entire world of tentacles almost compels the reader to pick it up. And, as often as not, once the comic is in the readers hands, its sold. That is the covers job after all, and this cover does it best.

As noted, the regular and "regular variant" covers both feature Hawkman. That seems an odd choice for a story that features the Legion of Super-Heroes so heavily that it basically relegates the JLU to cameo status in their own book. My guess is that JLU #9 will feature Hawkman pretty heavily and that these covers were initially slated to go with that chapter. If my theory on this chapter being filler holds, then it may have been that it was simply easier to use the covers originally planned for this issue and figure out what to do for covers on the final chapter, now scheduled for Issue #10, than to commission new covers for #8 on the fly.

The "regular variant" cover by Rod Ries, pasted at the bottom of this review, is marginally more interesting then the regular version, at the top.  It's just a shot of Hawkman. So, you know, whatev. The regular cover, though, makes little sense. It seems to depict Hawkman as the god-like warrior directing an alien armada. But, when last ween in Issue #7, he was working solo for Byth, presumably under mind control, while the Thanagarian fleet was on the opposite side, defending against the Infinity Wraiths. And, while the painted feel of the regular cover is cool, it's impression is cold, and impersonal. This one really could have benefitted from some cover copy to tell us why we should care.

PAGE ONE
This is actually a decent prologue, and using Dream Girl, who can see the future, to recap the past, is inspired. Over the four panels, as we move in tight on the stars reflected in Dream Girl's eye, we get a genuine sense of foreboding. Nice work.

1:1
This is Nura Nal, of the planet Naltor, codename: Dream Girl. Thus, the line, "It all started with a dream . . ." is a play on her as well as a lead-in to the official Legion bio. She is a platinum blond. For that reason, for the first 30 years or so after her debut in ADVENTURE COMICS #317 (on-sale Dec. 26, 1963), her hair was white. Sometimes she was given silver highlights (a wide spread of blue streaks using the old dot-matrix coloring), but always, the base color was white. Over the last several years, however, she has been getting yellow highlights, to the point where she has become an actual blond. My cynical guess is this has to do with her being depicted as somewhat of a ditz ever since the 1994 "Zero Hour" reboot. I presume this personality shift was done to depower her somewhat and limit her potential to be a walking dues ex machina. That depiction, altered somewhat — she was said to be so ditzy because she experienced multiple timelines simultaneously — stuck through the 2004 Mark Waid "threeboot," while the 2007 Geoff Johns "retroboot," which is the version we seem to have here, returned Nura to her more powerful persona.

1:2
I think the proper word here is "intragalactic," not "intergalactic." Otherwise, why would the Legion only become, as stated in the next panel, "symbols of hope uniting a galaxy." Why just one? Why not every galaxy in which R. J. Brande was an industrialist?

The idea that Brande wanted "a team of young heroes made up of every race in the United Planets" is specific to the reboot version of the team. Originally, there was a rule that every member should have at least one unique super-power. Then ensured variety and kept the team from becoming the Legion of Super-Superboys. During the threeboot, it was said that, technically, any teenager anywhere could claim to be a member. It was only during the reboot, when the U.P. drafted members onto the team, that we were told of a goal, never quite met, to ensure every member-world had a Legion representative.

1:3
"Inspired by 21st century legends like the Justice League" is a new contrivance. Originally, of course, the team was inspired by Superboy, as the said when we first saw them in ADVENTURE COMICS #247 (on-sale Feb. 27, 1958). The Crisis on Infinite Earths reboot of the mid-1980s resulted in Superman never having any adventures as a boy, and near-constant hoop-jumping ever since to explain just who or what inspired Brande to fund the Legion's formation in the first place.  Generally, whether in the form of pocket-universe Superboys or Teen Titans, or champions of the heroic age, the inspiration was always young heroes, to sort of explain why Brande felt justified in sending 13 and 14 year olds out into harm's way to fight crime and corruption. Lately, however, because EVERYthing in the DCU must revolve around the Justice League, they've taken over the role of historic inspiration. You'd think that's lead to the White Witch leading a team called Legion of Super-Heroes Dark, but what do I know?

1:4
I'll only say here that I appreciate this starscape image appearing painted, rather than photoshopped. Inserting photos into comics almost never works as it tends to jar, and thus draw the reader out of the narrative.

PAGE TWO and THREE
Here, in three panels, we get an overview of the Legion's growth, from three neophyte founders to an actual legion of super-heroes. Unfortunately, these panels represent a real missed opportunity. One of the big critiques with this story has been how Lemire has played fast and loose with continuity. After all, in the most-recent Legion series, Paul Levitz killed off Star Boy and Sun Boy, added new members Chemical Kid, Dragonwing and Harmonia, and had the team's leader, Phantom Girl, bug out under pressure and flee to her home dimension. Yet all three are back in this story, while the new additions are nowhere to be seen, as if the entire New 52 series never happened. For many fans who hated the cowardly depiction of Phantom Girl, one of the Legion's most experienced and capable members, and the unnecessary deaths, ignoring the New 52 was an easy trick and Lemire explained his rationale for doing so in an Oct. 30, 2014, interview with Newsarama, saying:

"I'm just bringing it back to what people think of as a classic Legion and not worrying too much about all the minutia of continuity. It's very much the classic Legion."

Okay, that's all fine and well, but in this issue we are treated to appearances from several members of the reboot team, some of whom were dead, last we knew. Now, it's worth noting that the reboot Legion was explained away wirh the threeboot as being from an alternate dimension, specifically Earth-247. That reality was destroyed, although much of the Legion survived. If Lemire wants to undestroy that reality, that's fine with me, although he may have to get a new Earth number from Grant Morrison. What is not fine is that what we have here is members from that reality, such as Kinetix, Monstress, Andromeda and Kid Quantum, mixed in with the "classic" Legion as if they've been part of the mix all along. Well, no. You can't do that. There's "not worrying too much about the minutia of continuity," and then there's ignoring it altogether. But I guess Lemire gets away with it because it's the Legion. I'm not so sure DC would let him pen a Justice League story that, without explanation, includes the Detroit team, a handful of Justice Society members, a revived Elongated Man and, what the heck, some Milestone characters.

The missed opportunity is that Lemire could have had his four-colored cake and eaten it, too, right here on Page 2. Instead of two panels showing the progression of the team, he could have called for four, slowly upping the character count to include the reboot members who never appeared as members of the "classic" team. Last issue, Lemire had the members of the short-lived LEGION LOST title show up. Since this show's his story accepts at least that much of the New 52, it would be easy enough for readers to accept that new heros were initiated into the Legion in addition to Chemical Kid and Dragonwing, since the seven members lost in the 21st century were presumed dead in the 31st. Many fans have balked at Gates and XS being moved by Geoff Johns from the reboot continuity into the retroboot, or current team, while leaving others stranded in limbo. There's been enough online joy expressed fans at seeing these abandoned members, despite their nonsensical addition to this story, that Lemire could have made himself a hero my giving fans some logical way to include them in current continuity. Of course, the Convergence event promises a new boot, so it's probably all moot, anyway.

2:1
The three founding members of the Legion, from left, Cosmic Boy, Lightning Lad and Saturn Girl, and shown fighting Universo. Nothing wrong with that, although it generally takes more teamwork and less brute force to bring down the master manipulator. If it were me, instead of depicting the founders in their current costumes, I would have called on artist Neil Edwards to show them in their original costumes, from their first appearance, just to reinforce the "in the beginning" sense this panel is trying to portray. I also would have put them up against some villain we've never seen before. Legion fans are a creative lot and, I'm sure, would have had a ball naming this early nemesis and coming up with a backstory for him. Heck, it wouldn't even surprise me for that into to eventually get folded into official continuity. Where the Legion is concerned, stuff like that has happened before.

2:2
So, here, to depict how much "the Legion's ranks grew," we add all of three members to the founding trio. They are, from left, Colossal Boy, Bouncing Boy and the second Invisible Kid. They're matched up against the original Fatal Five, Validus, Mano, Emerald Empress, Tharok, and the Persuader. Never mind that there's no time at which this roll call of Legionnaires would have gone up against this line-up of Fatal Fivers. That's me being charitable and "not worrying too much about all the minutia of continuity."

Again, if it were me, I would have had Edwards draw a team consistent with the line-up from about the time Matter-Eater Lad joined the team, in ADVENTURE COMICS #303. I'd ask to see the team gang tackling some group of villains, such as the Chameleon Men from ACTION COMICS #287, since I'm sure they tried to invade the Earth more than once. I'd have had Saturn Girl, now in her classic Silver Age costume in the back, clearly communicating with a phantom-state Mon-El, who is pointing the team forward to their adversaries. And, just to throw a real bone to true Legion fans, I'd have directed Edwards to show electricity coming from Star Boy's eyes.

My next panel on this page would have depicted the Bronze Age team, including the latter-day Adventure series members, as well as Wildfire, Tyroc, and Dawnstar, probably at Chemical King's funeral (with Ferro Lad and Invisible Kid statues seen), along with some text about losses along the way. Finally, my fourth panel would have show the team circa 1988, with Tellus, Quislet, Polar Boy, Sensor Girl and Magnetic Kid in the line-up, as well as Blok, White Witch and Invisible Kid II.

3:1
And, on this page with the current team, I would have included all of the reboot members this issue adds in, this intimating that they are more recent additions to the team, utilizing versions from the New 52 Earth, which handily explains away deaths and whatnot we'll discuss later.

What we have here instead is, sans explanation, somewhat confusing. To this point in Lemire's story, which started in JUSTICE LEAGUE UNITED ANNUAL #1 and continued in JLU #s 6 and 7, what we've seen has been Geoff John's retroboot team. Now, just to recap, for those who don't know, when Mark Waid's do-over failed to catch on, John's returned the Legion to it's original continuity, explaining that the Waid version, or threeboot, was actually the Legion of Earth-Prime — in other words, the far future of our earth. He then reintroduced the original Legion, appearing to pickup where the






[IN PROGRESS, POSTED BEFORE COMPLETION TO TEST PICTURE LAYOUT ON NEW TEMPLATE]


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CAPSULE COMMENTS: For comics on-sale Jan. 14, 2015




It was a decent week for me at Zimmie's Comics in Lewiston, Maine. Eight new comics appeared in my folder, plus one re-order. Here are a few quick thoughts on each book, along with the requisite letter grade.


ALL-NEW CAPTAIN AMERICA #3
Marvel Comics, $3.99
[MILDLY RECOMMENDED)

The main thrust of this issue is that it rectoned out of continuity the "Snap" Wilson retcon. So, the Falcon, or Captain American as we now know him, was never a drug-pushing pimp, and the original continuity, which we were once led to believe was a lie, is once again how things were. I suppose that's necessary, even if the Snap Wilson thing has been ignored for long enough that I think most fanboys had forgotten it. After all, even in this age, we need our Cap to be a heroic persona, not a reformed one. Still, this issue represents a lot of what's wrong with comics these days. What we have here is not so much a story, as a story that explains a past story (and one almost 40 years old, at that!). Spending absurd amounts of time obsessing over backstory is one reason I can't even look at Hawkman today, because I know what I'm going to get is new details explaining exactly which version of the character I'm reading about, rather than a new adventure of that character. Similarly, what should have been the main trust of this book — Cap's forced suicide to save his family amid Hydra's plot to sterilize everyone in the world not a member of its evil organization — is relegated to the back of the book. I'm hopeful that, now that we've established Sam Wilson was a hero from Day 1 (did anybody really doubt it), we can get back to the much more interesting adventure at hand. But, for my money, this issue really stalled things out. 

I'll also say I was confused over the WWII battle scenes during the first half of the book. I thought at first, based on the text, that Cap had traveled into the past. Then I realized it was all an illusion projected by Sin (who could've looked more like a chick, frankly), but was distracted from the story wondering how she was doing it. By the time we finally got back to reality, I was fairly well exasperated and ready to move on to something else in my buy-pile.  
(Read Time: 11:25, plus 0:45 for recap page) 
GRADE: C+ 



ASTRO CITY #19
DC Comics (Vertigo imprint), $3.99
[RECOMMENDED]

Astro City is one of my favorite books, probably because it is the most "old school," in terms of storytelling, of everything on the stands today. Here we get, even amidst a continued story, a full plot with plenty of characterization. We also get lots of little bits, such as Crackajack's true origin, that let the reader fill in the details, helping to expend the universe at hand. I'll only say that while this tale was a wistful riposte on the topic of aging (done better than about a million JSA stories) it was a little too much tell, and not enough show. Quarrel narrated her history throughout and, more than once, I found myself thinking, "Who are you talking to, exactly?" So, in that sense, this story may have been a little too old school. Still, I'll remember it long after I've forgotten much of what else was in thy buy-pile this week. That may be because artist Brent Anderson (while I'd still like to give him an inker) gives us a layout that moves the story along and is not so decompressed that it takes 12 panels to show Quarrel leaping off a building and smacking snot out of some evil-doer. 
(Read Time: 17:00, plus 3:50 for lettercol and promo pages) 
GRADE: A-



BATGIRL #38
DC Comics, $2.99
[HIGHLY RECOMMENDED]

I am really, really grooving on the "new" Batgirl. What we get here is fairly standard, thematically. Babs has to come to grips with whether she's a hero, or a vigilante menace. Clearly, she thinks the former while her new police officer boyfriend thinks the former. But the way the story is told feels fresh and modern, using social media as a form of peer pressure in a way the now-canceled ABC-TV show Selfie (starring Karen Gillan, who should totes play Batgirl in the movie version of this book) only hoped it could do. And, while we're talking tv-shows, the dating scenes, mixed with a generous dose of internal conflict, are reminiscent of the best episodes of Sex and the City. Honestly, BATGIRL is the book to show your female friends who wonder why you still read comic books at your age. Best of all, while Babs Tarr's artwork is clear and compelling, the panel breakdowns of writer Cameron Stewart rely on a traditional panel grid. That makes the book much easier for a comics neophyte to read than the helter-skelter, all-over-the-page designs many artists churn out in emulation of Neal Adams, who may have done more than anyone else in history to drive casual readers away from comics. Luckily, BATGIRL is written and drawn in such a way that it is not the exclusive playground of aging fanboys. Anyone can get into this book, and should. 
(Read Time: 15:15, plus 2:55 for promo pages) 
GRADE: A



DAREDEVIL #12
Marvel Comics, $3.99
[MILDLY RECOMMENDED]

I'm torn on this book. On the one hand, I love what writer Mark Waid and artist Chris Samnee have done with ol' hornhead. And the move out to San Fran has breathed new life into the character. But much of this issue felt like it was recapping previous chapters in this story. I'm torn over that because I generally feel modern comics don't offer enough in the way of recap, such that a casual fan can't just pick up any random issue — say because they're inspired by a fantastic cover, such as this one — and feel like they know what's going on. Once upon a time, it was accepted that any comic could be someone's first, and a well-written series didn't need so-called "jumping-on points." That said, I spent most of this issue feeling like I was being told things about Stunt-Master, and the plot-to-date, that I already knew. I mean, why go over that all again at all when you have a recap page, for gosh's sake? 

But maybe I was just annoyed at having my suspension of disbelief broken so thoroughly by this issue's main action scene. I can accept that Daredevil, though blind, can drive a vehicle at breakneck speeds. I can even accept, just because it's such a cool visual, that he'd choose to drive a convertible Dodge Charger while standing in the driver's seat, using his billy club(s) to operate the steering wheel, shifter, clutch, and pedals. What I cannot accept is that he could follow a motorcycle across a bridge jammed with traffic, or that by merely yanking on his club, he could get the Charger to go up on two wheels. Also, how he jams his billy club into the "spokes" of a speeding motorcycle tire without breaking both his arms is beyond me. 
(Read Time: 8:00, plus 0:45 for recap page) 
GRADE: B-



JUPITER'S LEGACY #5
Image Comics (Millarworld imprint), $4.99
[STRONGLY RECOMMENDED]

This issue was, quite frankly, super-cool. I'm not sure it was worth the interminable year-long wait between issues, nor do I think it was worth $5, but it was pretty neat nonetheless. The good news is that the story was handled well enough that I did not have to reference previous issues to understand what was happening, despite the long lag since the last outing. Fans of DC Comics' Legion of Super-Heroes, like me, will, of course, blanch at the villain using the name of The Molecule Master, but he was kind of awesome, with his evil mustache and the way he flushed the heroes out of hiding. What's most interesting about this book is that while we hear a lot of proselytizing on what it means to be a super-hero, we see characters doing some very un-heroic things. Sure, she's just defending her family, but Chloe clearly uses deadly force. And, I have to say, the image of Hutch using a train to plow down a column of government agents is one that will stay with me for a while. It will be interesting (say, in another year, when the next issue comes out) to see whether Chloe and Hutch end up paying for the death and destruction they've caused (as Jim Shooter might have demanded, a la Phoenix) or if, in the manner of the grim 'n' gritty '90s, this is all just par for the course and perfectly acceptable super-hero stuff. 
(Read Time: 11:45, plus 2:45 for promo pages)
GRADE: A



JUSTICE LEAGUE UNITED #8
DC Comics, $3.99
[NOT RECOMMENDED IN ANY TIMELINE]

This, friends was a terrible comic book. Terrible. Terrible. Terrible. If you happen to have read online interviews with writer Jeff Lemire, you might have seen him say it was not his intention to provide a Legion that fit any one continuity, but to present a sort of all-star cast. Well, that's all fine and good, but there needs to be some in-story explanation of that when you've got Legionnaires from different reboots appearing together in a line-up that could never have possibly happened. The shame is that, given a time-manipulating villain, the appearance of characters from at least three distinct versions of the Legion could have been easily explained in one throw-away line in one random panel. "Hey, Brainy, there are people wearing Legion flight rings I don't recognize!" "Yes, Infinitus' presence is pulling disparate timelines into one!" "Cool! Let's fight!!"

But, we don't get that, leaving us to wonder how and why we have Magno (depowered last we knew), Kinetix (terrorformeed last we saw), and Monstress (dead), fighting alongside the classic Legion team that, with Phantom Girl present and both Sun Boy and Star Boy not dead, seems to ignore completely the most recent New52 stories. Moreover, while the retroboot Legion that's appeared since Geoff John's rehabilitation of the team has implied the "five-year gap" stories of Tom and Mary Bierbaum never happened, we have characters from that era, in the form of Computo and Dragonmage, which implies they did. 

What we have here, then, is sort of the opposite spin on my concern with ALL-NEW CAPTAIN AMERICAN #3, above. In that issue, I fretted that too much attention was paid to a 40-year-old story most people have since ignored. Here, there doesn't appear to be any concern for continuity at all. And while I could readily accept tossing out continuity for the sake of telling a great tale, there are enough flat-out errors in this book that it's hard to accept anything was done on purpose. It all feels less ignoring-of-continutity than plain old ignorance. I mean, we have characters appearing in the roll call who are nowhere to be seen in the story, and vica versa; we have characters who showed up last issue who are gone in this outing, we have misnamed characters ("Colossal Lad?"), and, while we don't have the same character showing up twice in the same group shot wearing different costumes, as we did in Issue #7, we do get one character who was never a member (Radion), appearing alongside the team as though he were. Worse, not even the internal continuity is consistent. As the Legion prepares to go back in time, Dream Girl says Shadow Lass is on medical stasis on Mars, then, four pages later, she pops out of the time vortex fighting alongside the team. It all feels like there's either a giant disconnect between the writer and artist, or an editor at the helm who is completely clueless, and probably both.

And, just as this issue is the flipside of my critique of ALL-NEW CAPTAIN AMERICA, it also swings the pendulum on what I said about DAREDEVIL #12. While I thought Mark Waid over-explained his plot this far in that book, here Lemire makes zero effort to bring his readers up to speed. You'd think that, with the Legion relegating the JLU to cameo status in their own book, by the time a few JLU members do show up, Lemire might have dropped some minor recap. But no, he plunges straight ahead with the plot, such as it is. And here it is: Last issue, the JLU was trying to prevent Ultra from entering a time vortex. This issue, he enters it. That's about it. Ultimately, not much going on. Literally, it took you longer to read this review than it would have taken to read the issue in question. And, at $4, that's the worst travesty of all. Besides having no plot to speak of, and errors galore, this comic is simply a piss-poor entertainment value. 
(Read Time: 5:15, plus 2:55 for promo pages). 
GRADE: F



S.H.E.I.L.D. #2
Marvel Comics, $3.99
[TEPIDLY RECOMMENDED]

Well, this issue was cute enough. Or at least it would be, as an 8-page back-up story. I have to say, Mark Waid has really been letting me down on this title, enough so that this is probably my last issue. The storytelling in this issue, as in the last, is so decompressed that there's really no plot to speak of. The tale reads less like a story than a vignette. I mean, S.H.I.E.L.D. tracking a surplus weapons ring to Ms Marvel's school is a nice hook, even if I could have used a little more of an explanation on how the kids came to be part of the black market in villain equipment trade in the first place, but then the kids are caught and that's that. The scene of students puking up poison pizza dough is a hoot, but I'm unclear on what connection it had to anything. Who sent it? Were the dough creatures supposed to steal the weapons back from the kids? All we know is that Ms Marvel impressed Coulson by catching the creatures. 

Additionally, while I totally dig the new Ms Marvel, and Waid nails her character pretty well, Humbert Ramos' art is so stylized that it's sort of unclear, until she specifically says she's doing so, when she's using her powers. But then, I've always found Ramos' art hard to follow, even if it is fun to look at. I also wouldn't recognize the characters he draws as the actors from the tv show, without being told. Under a different artists I think this story could have been better, which isn't meant to be an insult to Ramos. His considerable talents are just mismatched to this title, I think. 
(Read Time: 11:10, plus 0:20 for intro page). 
GRADE: B



STAR WARS #1
Marvel Comics, $4.99
[RECOMMENDED, IF YOU CAN GET THE RIGHT COVER]

The best thing I can say about this issue is that John Cassaday nails, and I mean absolutely nails, the actor likenesses. The plot is a little thin — the rebels arrive on an Empire planet intent on blowing it up, and then Vadar shows up — but Jason Aaron's script is meaty enough to make up for that. We get some fun one-liners and all of the characters sound true to themselves. However, not being an active purveyor of Star Wars material outside of the films, I am a bit confused as to the placement of this story. It certainly seems to pick up soon after the original Star Wars movie (which I still refuse to call, STAR WARS IV: A NEW HOPE). Why this should be, I don't know. I would have thought that with Marvel and Lucasfilm now both owned by Disney, this new series would serve to fill in the gap between STAR WARS: RETRUN OF THE JEDI and the upcoming sequel, STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS. Why we're covering ground I'm sure other Star Wars comics have covered before, and which I'm certain must contradict Marvel's original Star Wars series, is beyond me. 

Still, my only real problem with this book is that it's simply not worth $5. The first four pages are completely wasted imitating the film openings, while the final 10 are worldless previews of pages from the upcoming Darth Vader and Princess Leia series. Both look nice, but the art makes it appear the storytelling in them will be decompressed enough that they, too, will be poor values. In the end, this issue is cool enough as a Star Wars event, but I foresee me dropping the title from my pull list once the first story arc is complete, if not before. As far as collectibility goes, this issue reportedly shipped one million copies, so all of the value (if you're into that kind of thing) will depend on which cover you managed to get. I got the standard cover, which means, less-than-cover-price forever. 
(Read Time: 11:05, including preview pages) 
GRADE A- 



ABIGAIL AND THE SNOWMAN #1 (of 4)
BOOM! Studios (Kaboom! imprint), $3.99
Originally released Dec. 31, 2014.
[BARELY RECOMMENDED]

Occasionally, I like to spice my usual super-hero diet with something from some other genre. For years, the standard go-to in that regard were the Disney comics published by Gladstone, and then Gemstone. So, I've a bit of a soft-spot for the kind of "kiddy comics" I would have skoffed at as a kid. I was many years an adult before I purchased my first Archie comic, and Harvey was long out of business before I began gobbling up their output. You may then understand my mindset when I saw the preview art for this issue and thought, oh, yeah, sure, I'll try that. Well, it was okay, just not okay enough for me to bother with subsequent issues. That's mainly because of the $4 price point. Just not enough here for that outlay. Sue me, but 50¢ per minute of read time is just too rich for my blood!  

The story tries hard, and hits all the standard plot points one would expect if this was a Disney movie. Trouble is, it spends so much time establishing Abigail's loneliness and eccentricity that I was kind of bored with her by the time the snowman showed up. It might have been better to have started with the snowman and then establish Abigail's character through her efforts to keep him hidden. After all, how much fun would THE IRON GIANT have been if said giant had not shown up at all until the third act? I also found the art to be a little stiff, and suspect it was rendered on a computer. The "Zookeepers" strip on the back cover was actually nicer looking, with better line weight and spotting of blacks. For what it's worth, my local comics shop did not get the copy I ordered (I was the only customer to ask for it, apparently) when it first came out. The shop owner had to place a re-order, which I just got this week.  
(Read Time: 8:05) 
GRADE: C 



That's it for this week, except to note a few stats on the nine comics I brought home:

TOTAL RETAIL COST: $36.91
MY COST (retail - 20% LCS discount + 5.5% ME sales tax): $31.14

COVER PRICE
High: $4.99 (Jupiter's Legacy #5, Star Wars #1)
Average: $4.10
Median: $3.99
Low: $2.99 (Batgirl #38)

PRODUCT PAGE COUNT
High: 48 (Star Wars #1)
Average: 32
Median: 32 
Low: 28 (Abigail #1, All-New Cap #3, Daredevil #12, SHIELD #2)

STORY PAGE COUNT
High: 34 (Star Wars #1)
Average: 23.5
Median: 22
Low: 20 (All-New Cap #3, Batgirl #38, Daredevil #12)

STORY VALUE (price/story page count)
Best: 14.68¢/pg (Star Wars #1)
Average: 17.63¢/pg
Median: 18.13¢/pg
Worst: 19.95¢/pg (All New Cap #3, Daredevil #12)

STORY READ TIME
High: 17:00 (Astro City #19)
Average: 11:10
Median: 10:55
Low: 5:15 (JLU #8)

ENTERTAINMENT VALUE (price/story read time)
Best: 19.83¢/pg (Batgirl #38)
Average: 42.18¢/pg
Median: 42.47¢/pg
Worst: 76.0¢/pg (JLU #8)

PRODUCT READ TIME (inc. letter cols, promo/preview pages, etc.)
High: 20:50 (Astro City #19)
Average: 12:35
Median: 11:30
Low: 8:08 (Abigail #1)

TOTAL ENTERTAINMENT VALUE (price/total read time)
Best: 16.61¢/pg (Batgirl #38)
Average: 36.38¢/pg
Median: 34.70¢/pg
Worst: 49.38¢/pg (Abigail #1)

PANEL AVERAGE (panels/story pages)
High: 7.15/pg (Batgirl #38)
Average: 4.74/pg
Median: 4.58/pg
Low: 2.23/pg (JLU #8)

WORD AVERAGE (words/story pages)
High: 
Average:
Median:
Low:

ADVERTISING PERCENTAGE (total pgs inc. covers/(ad pgs - house ad pgs))
High: 25% (Batgirl #38, JLU #8)
Average: 12.61%
Median: 9.38%
Low: 0% (Jupiter's Legacy #5)



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CAPSULE COMMENTS: New comics for the week of July 9, 2014


Wow, what a hit-and-miss week! There were a couple of comics in this week's stack from Zimmie's that really rang my fanboy bell, but also several I simply did not enjoy at all. Which was which? Here's the rundown:



Amazing Spider-Man #1.3
Marvel Comics, $3.99

I actually did not pre-order the "one-point" issues of this new Spidey series when they were first solicited. The comics curmudgeon in me figured ol' Marvel was just trying to milk me for extra money, while I presumed this would be another pointless "Year One" retcon. Instead, this has been a series that has added layers and depth to the original stories, while being a fun, tightly plotted tale in its own right. Sure, a lot of the beats are familiar, with the rejected super-fan turning toward villainy, but this story arc reminds me so much of the comics of my youth, I'm calling that a plus.  GRADE: A



Daredevil #5
Marvel Comics, $3.99

I had a few issues with this issue. For one, it's  not clear to me until ol' hornhead starts reminiscing about Leapfrog that the giant robot is actually a giant, mechanical leapfrog. But maybe that's me. Second, it's not at all clear to me why the leaping robot suddenly goes on self-destruct. Did Daredevil trigger something when he stuck his billy-club in it? Did the pilot set the mecha-amphibian to self-destruct? And, if so, was that the plan all along, or an accident? Regardless, all that is secondary to the main point of the story, which was allowing Foggy Nelson to go out in a blaze of glory. For him, I'm happy. GRADE: A



All-New Invaders #7
Marvel Comics, $3.99

An improvement over reent issues, although it's still unclear to me just why Radiance, having learned of the Invaders' "original sin" while in New York, traveled all the way back to Japan in order to demand they explain themselves to her. Overall, the story here is good, although this issue and the previous one could have been done just as well as a single-issue story. What I wonder, however, is why James Robinson doesn't petition his editor to change the title of this book to All-New Human Torch, since that seems to be the book he wants to write anyway, and given that he's de-powered Johnny Storm over in Fantastic Four. GRADE: B+



Fantastic Four #7
Marvel Comics, $3.99

And speaking of the FF, it's worth noting that not only does the scene on this cover not happen inside, Invisible Woman and the Hulk don't even appear anywhere in this issue. Poor editorial oversight? Possibly. If not, the disconnect between what happens with the Thing here — he participates in the battle with the Orb long enough to learn a secret, then comes back to berate Johnny — and what happens to him in Original Sin — where he's still walking around possessed by Midas — certainly is. This comic was the quickest read of the month. I blew through it in just over 6 1/2 minutes. At $4, this book cost about 62¢ per minute. Phone sex is a better deal!  GRADE:  C




Infinity Man and the Forever People #2 
DC Comics, $2.99

Well, it's a great cover, as spectacularly good as the debut issue was bad. But, beyond that, what you get here is buckets full of "meh." I'm a big Tom Grummet fan, but I wonder if he's out of practice from not having had a regular book on the stands in a while, or if this was a rush job. Either way, the art here is kind of static, especially on the first few pages, lacking Grummet's usual dynamism. The plot also is fairly uninspired and, for the life of me, I can not yet figure out why this book exists. Doesn't matter, I dropped it with by September pre-order. GRADE: C



Grayson #1
DC Comics, $2.99

This book is, I think, a good example of a writer having a world of ideas in his head but failing to translate the epic-ness of his tale to paper. There are way too many things wrong with this issue to list in a capsule comment. I'll cover them in the longer review. Let's just say this issue struck me as someone trying to be as uber-cool as Grant Morrison's Doom Patrol, having only read the Rachel Pollack version. The tagline for this book is, "You don't know Dick." I don't know how anyone could know anything after having read this. GRADE: C-





Winter Solder: The Bitter March #5 (of 5)
Marvel Comics, $3.99

So, this was basically, a pointless waste of time. I should have suspected as much, knowing that this book was set in the past and would eventually have to restore the status quo to what it was before Bucky Barnes reappeared as the Winter Soldier. Sadly, this entire five-issue series is something that could have been done just as well, better actually, back in the day as a single 10-page story. And that with art that didn't look like something sketched out during the bus ride to work. GRADE: D+




The Royals: Masters of War #6 (of 6)
DC Comics (Vertigo imprint), $2.99

This is a series that utterly failed to live up to its promise, but maybe that's because I thought I was being promised some kind of World War II version of Arrowsmith. In the end, what we got was a poorly conceived family melodrama with characters straight out of central casting. I imagine that even the creators knew, when they dropped the bomb at the end, that the reading public would not be clamoring for a sequel. GRADE: D



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CAPSULE COMMENTS: New comics for the week of July 2, 2014

The weekly pilgrimage to Zimmie's netted eight new comic books this week, including the much anticipated Rocket Raccoon #1. Did the mag live up to the hype? Let's hit the capsule comments to find out!


Rocket Raccoon #1
Marvel Comics, $3.99

Yes! Yes, Scottie Young's version of your favorite rascally ringtail is every bit as good as you'd imagine. Kudos to Marvel for releasing this fun comic (and isn't fun what comics are supposed to be?) just before release of the Guardians of the Galaxy movie, and without spoiling the plot of that flick in any way. I will say, however, it's a mystery to me why Marvel doesn't have kiosks set up at every multi-plex in America selling comics tied to its movie releases. The trick since the mid-'70s collapse of newsstand distribution is to get the comics where the kids are, and movie theaters seem like just the place to capture casual readers predisposed to sampling a comic based on the film they've just seen.  GRADE: A



Justice League 3000 #8
DC Comics, $2.99

I was afraid when the male half of the "wonder twins" turned out last issue to be a psychopathic murderer that this series had jumped a 31st century shark. Not so, and JL3K remains one of my favs currently being published, especially as the heroes grow into their roles and become more heroic. I was a little concerned with Lantern ex machina, however, as GL's solution seemed a little too easy; a little too pat. Also, it sort of spoils the big, last-panel reveal that Flash is now a chick when you've got her plastered all over the cover. GRADE: A-




Green Arrow #33
DC Comics, $2.99

It's a bit of a pain for this old codger of a comic book fan to keep my New 52 continuity straight from the CW television version of our battling bowman, especially now that Diggle has been shoehorned into the cast. Still, this is good stuff. Heck, even hateful little Emiko is growing on me. I was bummed to learn Jeff Lemire and Andrea Sorrentino will be leaving at the end of this arc, as they're the reason I came back to Green Arrow after dropping it early in the current run. Given that the new team will include creators from the TV show, I'm kind of hoping DC can somehow merge continuities, but that's doubtful. At the very least, here's hoping for Felicity! GRADE: B+



Scooby-Doo Team-Up #5
DC Comics, $2.99

A fun little story. Pretty straight-forward, nothing tricky. But then, this is a title for "kids." Still, these days I'm thankful for any comic that can tell a story in one, or even two issues, and there were a few decent gags. That art was WAY basic however, and I suspect it was drawn with a tablet, rather than on paper. It was interesting to me to note that Wonder Woman here sports her original "eagle tits" costume, rather than the more recent, trademark-able "double-W" version. I've been kind of a fan of this book and I've hoping for future team-ups with Wendy, Marvin and Wonder Dog, the Wonder Twins, the full Super Friends team, Rex the Wonder Dog, Detective Chimp, and, yes, the Legion of Super-Heroes . . . or, at least the Subs. GRADE: B+



Earth-2 #25
DC Comics, $3.99

So, we finally get the official debut of Val-Zod as the Superman of Earth-2. Of course, this is less and less like "my" Earth-2 all the time, even if it is intriguing enough. For some reason, as the heroes finally start coming together, I find myself FAR more interested in the Tom Taylor heroes — Aquawoman, Thomas Wayne Batman, Genius Jimmy, Lois Tornado and Val — than Green Lantern, Flash, Hawkgirl, and the other characters James Robinson created to launch this series. While I am fascinated by the newer characters, I fault the glacial movement of the over-arching plot, along with how little actually happens in any one issue. I read this entire comic in a little more than eight minutes, and that's a short read for my four bucks! GRADE:  B



Original Sin #5 (of 8)
Marvel Comics, $3.99

The mid-series retcon of Nick Fury's history sort of grinds this book to a halt for me, in part because it raises more questions than it answers. For one, was Fury still leader of the Howlin' Commandoes? It doesn't seem so, although he's once again age-appropriate to have been in World War II. And, really, how did Fury find time to rise up to become director of S.H.I.E.L.D., never mind running that organization while playing Punisher-in-Space? Also, I hate Life Model Decoys. They're total copouts for sloppy storytelling. Seriously, they're the friggin' Superman Robots of the Marvel Universe. GRADE: B



Aquaman and the Others #4
DC Comics, $2.99

I'm happy to see Vostok back, but I do have to wonder how his spirit self stuck in the ghost lands was able to give Ya'wara his actual, physical helmet? That's really the only fun part of this book, however. The A-plot with Legend and his evil grandkids is as basic as the artwork. Not much to write home about, for sure. Plots are going to have to be about more than some ancient big bad trying to steal the Atlantean artifacts if this book is to survive. Although, based on sales, we may not have to worry about the Others' long-term prospects. GRADE: C




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